Motherhood is not a job title.
Sometimes the simplest statement can hold such revelation. But in a world where women do juggle so many titles, and motherhood is one of many jostling for our time and attention, the implication of that little bundle of words can be rather profound. Motherhood is not a job title.
Our career changes. Relationship status changes. Our living situation changes. But once a mother, always a mother. From the moment life buds within your womb, you are a #forevermum.
Some mothers have never met their living, breathing babies. They are still mothers.
Some mothers are estranged from their children. They are still mothers.
Some mothers relinquished their children into the care of another. They are still mothers.
Some mothers are grieving the death of their children. They are still mothers.
Some mothers adopted their children. They are still mothers.
You cannot stop being a mother. Even if you wanted to. Even if the world plays down the importance and reverence of motherhood, the evidence in our bodies and souls cannot be refuted. Motherhood is a state of being that, once taken up, cannot be shed.
Why is that?
We all know what happens physically when a woman becomes a mum. Her body stretches and stretches. And then stretches some more. Her innards get busy in sciencelab-esque operations, concocting the right chemicals and reactions to instigate bodily changes in order to accommodate and nourish a developing baby. And then there’s D-day. Delivery day, that is. When little beloved is ejected.
She holds her baby for the first time, staring into eyes that are infrequently open. The euphoria is exquisite. At least until the adrenaline dissipates and sleep deprivation sets in.
But what happens to a woman emotionally and spiritually when she becomes a mum?
I have a theory.
It’s widely agreed that you change when you become a mother. Agreed. Yet, I would say it’s something far more grandiose than that. So deep and profound is the experience. I believe women essentially become a new version of themselves when they become a mother. They undertake a metamorphoses. Yes, I’m seeing butterflies emerging from their chrysalis. Women don’t change when they become a mum, they transform.
Authors Myla and Jon Kabat-Zinn said:
“In giving birth to our babies, we may find that we give birth to new possibilities within ourselves.”
Our spirit is enlarged and awakened to big concepts of WHO we are and HOW we fit into the larger scheme of things. The intricacies of life are given more weight and those things that once seemed so big and important – we’re happy to let them fly away in the breeze.
Like job titles. They’re great, but a #forevermum knows that they don’t define her. They may be important today, but there’s every chance that a few years, a few months, a few days down the line, they won’t be.
But being a mum. That’s a title that fits like a crown and can never be dismantled.
Watch Jasmine’s story